I'm afraid
no one
loves a
Ploplit 
plopped
on a stump
in goo,
because
many things
in life
lack reason,
and are
very, very 
cruel.

Answers
are electrical
for the
sewer mage,
down deep 
beneath
the grey 
and cleaning
waves.

These futures
are forgotten,
plodding
in dim swim,
coiling
by the brick,
drips forever
unwritten.

Till ooze
becomes
eccentric,
to question,
buzz 
and 
speak,
turning all it
touches to the
grey scenarios
he seeks.

This poem was inspired by Dragon’s idea of the Sewer Mage.

Click here to see an earlier version of the Sewer Mage

Seriously 
guys?
Why'd 
I 
have
to 
get 
the
purple 
suit?
If
there's
a 
race 
of
Commie
Moonderthals
up 
here,
I'm 
a 
big
walking
grape 
target.

I went to 
the gas station
and found
gas prices were 
sky high.
So I went to the pet shop
to spend my gas money
on a hamster,
but hamsters cost more
than gas,
no lie!
But the pet lady 
told me that 
mamsters were free,
and I thought,
hey - lucky me - 
now I can spend my 
two "O" five
on ice cream.
I got the
mamster 
and the
little sucker
mangled my hand!
And I screamed
"This mamster
is as mean
as gasoline!"
With that
the mamster
chomped,
and I howled again,
"I'm gonna stick
this mamster in my 
gas tank!"
And the pet lady said,
"Sorry sir.  
You can't do that."
I asked why not,
and the pet lady said,
"Why sir,
don't you know?
Gas goes there."

Glamourarra Glitterarra
came to disco go-go
down from NY 
all the way to San Diego.

She said she was on
vacation,
in flash of lash
and boot a' move,
which caught the glint
of golfin' CEO's
dribbling lobster
on their 
money fat suits.

Those CEOs purred
"Glamourarra Glitterarra
on TV 
would be some
rabbit hat trick..."
all the while
feeling their wallets
grow ghoul green thick. 

But what those CEOs
did not know,
was that 
Glamourarra Glitterarra
worked in TV also,
and was broadcasting
back feeds 
from Orion's Belt
to M83 -
with those
sloshing CEOs
as the fool-stars
of her very own
#1 pan-galactic show.

Headless 
dressed
The 
Horseman
is 
here.

Washed 
in 
tons
of 
blind 
ride
fear.

A 
haunting 
made
from 
a 
suit 
of 
snakes.

While 
I's 
are 
eyeless,
in 
this 
our 
wake.

The
reason
why
Squorty
Tails,
the 
Delmarva
Fox 
Squirrel,
didn't
have
a
girl-squirrel-friend
wasn't
because
he 
didn't
know
how
to
charm
em',
but 
because 
he
was
endangered.

Click here to read more about the Delmarva Fox Squirrel.

Werewolves 
just don't bother me,
only traveling Weretos.
Never going home
when they know
they really should soon.
Oh I wish they'd go and
pester, Josie, Jill or Jeff
Check into the zoo at Salisbury
take up residence 
with that inconspicuous sloth.
Oh those, Weretos, Weretos,
where for out yous?
Making a ruckus at 
continental breakfast,
(that's where)
never bidding fond ados.
Always doing annoying things
like wearing out my new shoes
But really,
there's no sense in arguing
with an
"I Can't Wait!"
Cause a Wereto only knows 
one point of view...  
So pack an extra knapsack.
Hope the Stewardess doesn't ask.
The Wereto is going,
no matter when,
no matter how,
no matter what address.

They
will
always
correct
my
direction
even
though
I
know
there
are
no
wrong
writes,
just
the
one's
left.

*For Megan*