Guest financial commentary from DJWebb

I think McDonald’s executives are all smoking crack up at cooperate headquarters. Why would I make such a strong statement? Well, I went to the local McDonalds and ordered a large fry and double cheeseburger with no onions. I ordered the fries to get the new Monopoly game pieces. The McDonald’s guy at the McRegister smiled and handed me a large plastic cup too and said here is drink for you. I had already paid for my purchase which only came to $2.50 or so for the fries and double cheeseburger. I am not sure why he gave me the free drink… maybe he just thought I was a nice guy who was thirsty. None the less the cup had two Monopoly game pieces on it. So between my fries and my free drink I had four Monopoly game pieces. I carefully stumbled to my car with my purchase and anxiously sat down with my game pieces. The first one I peeled was Parkplace for $1,000,000 but it requires Boardwalk to win the million dollar prize. Next I got an instant win piece for a McFlurry! Then I got one of the railroads which you need to collect all four to win a outdoor adventure vacation. Last I open my fourth game piece and won a medium breakfast value meal! Damn skippy I say! My investment of $2.50 eneded up with a 32 ounce free coke, free McFlurry, and free breakfast value meal! Then when I got home I discovered they have a internet site for the game that allows you a second chance to win a prize for each game piece you receive! I entered all four codes and cleaned up with a $20 PC Game, a ringtone, and a song download from Sony.

Okay, so you wonder what is wrong with this picture? I don’t think McDonald’s is trying to make a profit anymore. I think the management has gone batty and decided to give away all of the company’s profits through Monopoly 2.0 and its sheer kindness to its customers! This makes sense to me, as most people won’t buy McDonalds food cos it kills you… so they are forced to give the stuff away. I give McDonald’s (symbol MCD) stock a “SELL” rating for the next 30 days. I don’t claim to be an official financial planner or advisor but I have been able to predict the future in some circumstances. Good luck and invest your McDollars wisely.

There was an emergency call today at the lab. Some guy in one of the buildings came out of his office and saw another dude lying on the floor. So he did the responsible thing, ran back to the office, and dialed x3333 to report a “man down.”

Apparently, said dude had a twinge in his back. Since his office was too small, he walked out into the hall and laid down on the floor to do some stretches. I guess that looks like a “man down.”

Be careful what you sing for…

William Shatner just released a new album titled Has Been on October 05, 2004. He sings several cover songs on his new album, one of which is Pulp’s Common People. I must admit I really find the song very clever and humorous – but it doesn’t beat the original. I just hope Bill realizes he almost reflects the very wishful and demanding lyrics that he “sings” in his version of Common People. Well folks, I am here to say that we must put a stop to his self fulfilling sing-rock-phecy! I am in the process of ordering his album now and I hope you do too. I refuse to allow Bill to claim membership to us common people. The only way to prevent this is to propel him financially so that he continues to live a life afloat in stardom. Nanu Nanu.

Click here, download holdingitdown.wmv

It’s actually quite funny. I read a lot of discussion board forums on the WWW. I am always amused by the lively debates that ensue over such topics as religion, gun control, abortion, computer platforms, Carrot Top, etc… Unfortunately these debates are often very heated and users become very inflamed and start to sound like children in 6th grade attempting to show how clever they can be with what they perceive as witty insults and limericks. A majority of the time they end up sounding like uneducated, uninformed, babbling fools. Even worse is when you’ve been having a heated debate over ( insert controversial issue HERE) to soon discover the “forum poster” at the other end is in fact just twelve years old. Good-day.

Yesterday, I helped the technician that works on CDX-U, Jim, investigate a problem with the power supplies that run CDX-U‘s toroidal and vertical field coils. When we enable the power supplies, big switches in the basement close, connecting our field coils to the power supplies. Sometimes, the toroidal field (TF) switch starts feeling unhappy and it trips a breaker. So we have to go down stairs, hit the breaker, and watch the switch start working again.

So anyway, as we go down into the basement, which is cleaned out and well lit now that NCSX is going to be sharing the facilities with us, we pass a dead mouse in the middle of the floor. Jim tells me the mouse has been there for a good two weeks. It’s still there today, so I took some pictures of it.

It reminds me of the dead bird we found last year up on a girder in the ceiling the room where the Robicon power supplies are. That bird had been there for quite some time. He’s still there. He’s our watch bird.

I’ve been trying to write some music around which to frame Mike’s poem from a little further down.

These lines in particular really got to me:

“a structure
structure-less
sought where it isn’t
mown ”

“Against
the grass uncut
as mist falls
bending
light over
wrappers and cans
round beneath the rusted bridge
where a man hangs
by a cable”

” maps litter the backseat
taken from the center
where the man speaks a history
that turns in and over itself
wrapping me by”

I think there’s a song in there. A really pretty/creepy song.

Also, I need to get this whole new site thing figured out so I can post the newest recordings we’ve been working on. We’ve settled on the name Dash Eight (a nod to Piedmont/Chesapeake air and the Wico./O.C. Regional airport at which Mike and I always seem to end up…) That’s right- we have a name for real this time! Website can’t be too far behind, can it? Stay tuned. For a while.

I really hope Kerry brings up the whole pretzel issue at tonight’s debate. I think the Kerry campaign has forgotten about this wonderful incident. Even better, Kerry should bring the President a bag of pretzels to share at tonights debate.

I have been trying to fall asleep tonight but something keeps me awake. We hear a lot about the Iraq war but what about the multi-million dollar space defence system that protects us from nukes (CODE NAME = STAR WARS). Ronald Regan and his power rangers are the ones to thank for this system. This system, though classified – uses lasers, missles, hot steam, and compressed air to keep America safe. After all this system ended the cold war! I only wonder if GW has been keeping this system up and running or is he treating it like the Hubble?

The death of Superman is upon us on October 12, 2004. I write this as I am in my 37th hour of mourning. Many have asked how Superman died. While I don’t know the details – I do know the person responsible. George W. Bush. Yes, GWB played a role in the death of Superman. You see, Superman requires stem cells in order to maintain his existence on earth. I have seen Superman testify this fact to the United States Congress so I know this to be true. Unfortunately, President Bush failed to allow researchers to start new lines of stem cell research. Instead Superman and the scientific community have been forced to use only existing stem cells. This presents a horrific problem in that there are limited amount of existing stem cells and therefore limiting scientific exploration and Superman consumption is able to occur. Now Superman is dead.

What next? That is a good question. Personally I am thinking about moving to a more Super-Hero friendly country such as Canada. Stay tuned!