Search Phrases

After about 6 months of running, I decided to take a look at all the phrases that brought up our site in search engines. You see, when someone types in a phrase in search engine like Google and clicks on a result, the search phrase used to find the result is forwarded on to the site hosting the “result.” This phrase shows up in the server logs and various log analysis packages tally up the results.

So, looking through the search phrases that led people to our site show some expected and some unexpected results. Of course, obvious words like “protozoic” make sense (by far the most popular phrase), and it warms my heart that several people were obviously looking for us with phrases such as “mike tim gray spontaneous combustion protozoic” or “may i have some cake please video.”

Thanks to Tom, we have a wonderful selection of phrases originating from people searching for Committed ringtones for their cell phones. We can thank Brian for “infantryzone,” the “.475 wildey” phrases, and all the variations of “xtreme walking” and “parkour.” I have no idea why so many are interested in it, but it certainly seems popular. And of course, Fart Bomb is no doubt the target of “fart mp3,” “fart poetry,” “fart science projects,” “how do we fart,” and of course, just plain old “fart.” Wonder why people are so interested in farts?

All of these phrases that I’ve mentioned make sense. Of course, its interesting to see what exactly leads people to Protozoic, but still, the phrases do generally have something to do with the content. Its the others that confuse me:

  • “chia pet growth directions” – Isn’t it on the box/seed packet?
  • “parent’s benifits in prostitution” – This has a been a popular one. Not quite sure why.
  • “conspiracy pumpkin quicktime movie” – I’d like to see that.
  • “puffy pussies” – We’ve gotten several hits off of this. Different strokes for different folks.
  • “clap on clap off slogan” – I searched the site and couldn’t even find the word “clap” mentioned once. Same goes for “slogan.”
  • “venus’s moon” – This one makes me chuckle. Venus doesn’t have a moon, and when people go looking for info about it, they get this instead.
  • “cereals stuck in aisle” – I don’t even know what to say about this.

I look forward to the next 6 months of search phrases to see what kind of stuff brings people to Protozoic.

5 thoughts on “Search Phrases

  1. ““cereals stuck in aisle” – I don’t even know what to say about this. “

    This probably is someone trying to find out about the Acme supermarket fiasco from 5 or 6 years ago. Apparently Acme had some trouble with Kellog foods, the well known cereal company, and couldn’t get enough Kellog cereals to fill the normal shelf space quotas.

    Supposedly due to a purchasing glitch resulting in low order amounts Acme mostly had enough cereal to sell, but not enough to keep the shelves stocked to full capacity. Why keep the shelves stocked to full capacity? Apparently, according to some consumer psychology expert, a full shelf is more likely to attract customers than a half-filled shelf. So Acme corporate headquarters issued the now infamous memos advising managers to fill the back half of their shelves with specially constructed ‘dummy boxes’ which did not actually contain cereal. To avoid having the dummy boxes purchased by customers by mistake they were in several cases glued down producing the “stuck cereal” phemonena which many customers complained about at the time.

    There was some sort of class action lawsuit and I think an out-of court settlement was reached. The whole thing never really got much national attention, so it’s no suprise if you haven’t heard about it earlier.

  2. Yes, I use to always look at my keyword search results for the Kent Center . Always had some intresting “retard” or “retarded” keyword searches paired up with other random words. The most intresting one was “Retard Kenny Rogers” which for some reason led to the Kent Center Website. Amazing.

    Have a good weekend,

    -DJ WEBB

  3. Pete,

    I heard about something similar happening at Food Lion with the soup cans. Supposedly people were rolling the cans down the isles to check if they had soup in them. Though I don’t know how you can hear soup roll exactly… You wouldn’t know anything about that?


  4. Soup should make a “sloshy-sloshy-sloshy” sound if you shake the can really fast.

    But with the rolling thing, I’m not sure. A quick test I just ran shows that when a can of soup is rolled the internal sloshing dampens the roll and slows it down somewhat. I’d imagine a can filled with something solid would roll further than one filled with liquid.

    A rolled can of soup does also produce a slight sloshing sound, but not very pronounced. Maybe the smart shoppers in Food Lion areas were worried that rapid shaking of the soup would either rip apart the noodles or ligate them into tangled knots. They figured that a slowly rolled can of soup would not damage the contents in these ways.

    I hadn’t heard about these incidents though. Is this where the band “Bowling for Soup” got their name, do you think?

  5. You know, I wouldn’t have personally made that connection with Bowling for Soup and how they got their name, but it makes complete sense when I read your suggestion. I was going to write them and ask them if that was indeed the case, or ask their PR, but I couldn’t find a link for their email… though they did have links for everything else.

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