The Employment Mouse

The Employment Mouse

When the mouse costume arrived today, the thrill of exhilaration that surged through me must have surely been equal to that of Ben Franklin’s when he discovered electricity after being zapped by a lightning bolt. At some point however, during my frenzied celebration of running, foaming, leaping and shouting, it dawned on me that the things which were giving me ecstatic glee were perhaps only doing so because I was, rather sadly, unemployed. It had only been five minutes earlier that I’d been amusing myself by belching into an empty milk glass and trying to waft the fumes into my face. Silently cursing the particularly pesky milk fumes that refused to come out from the bottom of the milk glass, I was certain that the belching-wafting entertainment was a symptom of my unemployedness. The question was though, was my jubilance over the mouse costume? When Tim got home, I got my answer. I hadn’t even gotten one word out of mouth before Tim was fully garbed in downy mousey attire and making series of arcane mouse-ing motions with his arms. It was then that I, like Franklin perhaps, was privy to my own little piece of the light, and knew unemployed, or employed, that the mouse costume was timeless.

The Employment Mouse - chillin

12 thoughts on “The Employment Mouse

  1. Hey, who moved my cheese? I must say that is the hardest I have laughed in a good week. People out in the hall at work must think I am nutz.


  2. just a couple of things…

    “I’d been amusing myself by belching into an empty milk glass and trying to waft the fumes into my face” …um, ew? you kiss your girlfriend with that mouth?

  3. “…um, ew? you kiss your girlfriend with that mouth?”

    …um, whoa. You have a girlfriend now?

  4. Past tense. He did have a girlfriend until she saw him running around the house in his mouse-pumpkin costume.

  5. no, no…he who wrote the elegant prose about wafting milk belches was not running around in the mouse costume.

    but yeah, he does. and she’s super hot.

  6. I think you’re judging him too harshly for sampling the bouqet of his belches though.

    You gotta waft those milk belches don’t you? You don’t want them to just stagnate in there.

    Besides girls drink milk too (Well, at least the lactose-tolarent ones do). They have to so they don’t get osteoporosis. In my mind a girl who’s “super hot” is one who’s really understanding as well as physically attractive. Hence, I’d imagine that any girl who’s “super hot” would totally understand her boyfriend’s need to test the quality and staying power of his milk-belches. For the sake of her skeletal health I hope she tests her own as well.

    Coherence rating: 55%

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